When A Cattle Prod Is Sounding Good
As Hillary didn’t say, “It takes cojones.”
Randy and Teresa Stone, of Independence, Missouri, were “childhood sweethearts” and married for 20 years with two children when the Marine was found murdered by his wife who then called police.
In a touching, small town scene, the funeral service was conducted by Randy’s friend and reverend, David Love, who, it turns out, was seriously and professionally conflicted.
The good rev was having a long-term affair (better or worse than a fling?) with wife Teresa.
He was the trigger man while she sought information on how to collect her husband’s $800,000 life insurance policy the night he was murdered. Could we possibly wait for rigor mortis?
And in a new form of marriage equality, Reverend Love (what a name) was planning on murdering his spouse by breaking her neck and then staging a car crash so the love birds could live happily ever after.
Meanwhile, last month and a state or so away in Kentucky, Michael and Angela Hockensmith and their friend Daniel Smith were tragically murdered in their pawn shop, ABC Gold Games and More.
Kenneth Keith, pastor of Main Street Baptist Church, and himself owner of a pawn shop, presumably closed on Sundays, attended two of the funerals and expressed anguish on his Facebook page. He was also Mr. Hockensmith’s former pastor.
The pastor now stands charged with the murder of all three. Though, of course, he is presumed innocent, it can’t do much for Sunday attendance at his church.
Finally, and speaking of cojones, this time in the literal sense, leave it to the Orthodox Jews in Brooklyn to claim the religious and moral high ground, relatively speaking.
Wife needs a divorce? Not so fast. The hubby can refuse to provide a “get” , the document needed to proceed. Thus, his disenchanted mate is left in connubial limbo.
But not for long.
Rabbis to the rescue: Rabbi Mendel Epstein, and Rabbi Martin Wolmark, are happy to arrange a rabbinical court and, if necessary, “persuade” the stubborn hubby to sign on the dotted line. All the wife needs to do is come up with about a hundred grand and lure him to the New York area where he is in for a big “shock” in more senses than one.
The uncooperative husband is bundled into a van (a “not so courtesy shuttle”) and taken, perhaps, to a seedy warehouse in Queens. Rabbi Epstein was quoted in the Daily News as saying, ““We take an electric cattle prod . . . you put it in certain parts of his body and in one minute the guy will know.”
Indeed–show me where to sign.
It makes a catholic exorcism seem like a cake walk.
But that’s another story.
Atheism is looking better every day.
Sources: Daily News, Daily Mail, kentucky.com, Wiki